Overcoming the Fear of Success

Overcoming the fear of Success
The Guide that shows you how to break your self-destructive patterns-to get the love and the life you deserve
Martha Friedman, PhD. 1980

This Book will not solve your problems. But if you have a fear of success, and you’ll learn if you do or not in these pages— I hope that you’ll find enough material here to set you on the road to recognizing and overcoming your fear. —Martha Friedman

I thought this book would be

Magic. Pure Magic. I expected a full list of ingenious ideas that would lead me to my well anticipated mental freedom. I expected short cuts, unicorns and a pot of gold at the end of the Reading Rainbow.

What I got

An ass kick. Pure ass kick. (And I’ve read this book twice.)

I’m starting with one of my most challenging reads first. Challenging because it feels the most personal.
After honest evaluation, I may have to accept that I suffer from the fear of success.
Somedays I have this aching feeling that I can live life at some elevated level and the person that holds me back most is myself.

This book will exercise your demons and force you to deal with them directly.
(I know…right!?!…exactly how you want to spend your weekends and bus rides… analyzing yourself.)

Seriously, don’t read it unless you intend to call into question every relationship you have had.
Every person of influence who could have programmed messages that are now nesting in your subconscious waiting for the opportunity to prove your fears correct.

You’ll have to explore fun topics such as “the critics in our lives”, and “I don’t deserve it because”…
Take deep breaths as Friedman kicks open holes in your excuses and explanations.

What I learned from this book

Our caretakers, loved ones, and mentors are not perfect. They have issues also.
At some point and time, we have to untangle the roots of wiring, find the source of the dissonance and reprogram.
To become an individual, a person, a mature adult separate from our adolescence, we have to be willing to do the mental and emotional work.

We have to identify the voices that we hear, Develop our own program for parenting, and be diligent to that plan.

Why I Recommend

I recommend this for creatives, partners, friends, parents couples, so that we may see different perspectives on who we are, and understand how our words, expressions, and actions can profoundly influence the lives of others.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?…..

— Marianne Williamson